disclaimer: we all know how patriotic i am. my definition of patriotic being “i love america”. rather, if you are unaware of my patriotism, you should know that i own a massive american flag (her name is edith) that i like to hang over my bed. you should also know that i am a bit like sarah palin (tina fey? oh wait, no.) when it comes to defending weird things that we do – namely, we are never wrong.
but it is a bit laughable how americans have an affinity for sitting on their asses while watching others works theirs off. i’m talking about professional sports. for example, i am currently sitting here writing this while watching the bruins and canucks smash each other to pieces. i might add here that even if i hated the bruins, i would still be cheering for them because they are not from canada. ew. anyway, we have quite a culture built around sporting events. when are you allowed to consume copious amounts of beer and hot wings and then be obnoxiously, drunkenly loud without your neighbors calling the cops? oh i guess that’s called the superbowl. then again, i suppose that could happen on memorial day and the 4th of july… but that’s besides the point. another thing, why is it so fun to sit on the couch and eat ice cream while watching the biggest loser? i kind of feel like an asshole. “yeah man, you lose that 250 pounds, i’m just going to sit here and stuff my face with dairy deliciousness. but yeah, YOU CAN DO IT.” irony at its finest.
that being said, i have learned the hard way not to watch sports that you are really invested in while operating heavy machinery. in my case that would mean: do not elliptical while watching rugby. guess what i did yesterday? yeah. let’s just say i got a wee bit carried away and almost killed myself because i was not paying enough attention… clearly multitasking is not my strong point.
alright, enough of that. you should know that tomorrow i will be attempting to create this out of jello. it’s a practice run (note that i am rolling my eyes) for my dad’s birthday party. because normal flowers are too girly, so let’s stuff them in some jello. i had originally wanted to just get lots of different sized/shaped glass vases and fill them with colored water. i still maintain that this is a good idea. buttttt i will be testing out some jello. fear not, there will be a whole post devoted to this process, complete with quality pictures taken from my phone. it promises to be entertaining.